Today, in a pre-COVID world, we would be strolling down the romantic streets of Paris, exploring shops, relaxing in a perfect sidewalk café, admiring the beautiful people, and climbing the steps of the Eiffel Tower to gaze at the city bathed in the warm colors of sunset. This week marks 35 years of marriage and we were going to celebrate in Paris! Paris! In the Springtime!
I don’t tell you this “sad” story for sympathy. But I tell you because I’m giving myself permission to feel disappointed and to grieve this missed opportunity. I tell you because I am learning that denying our own feelings does not leave us with more love, care or empathy for others. In fact, it gives us perspective and allows us greater understanding and compassion to share. This is not sickness, job loss, front line risk, or death. It is just our loss and we are feeling it.
In times of disappointment, fear, limitation, frustration and loss, the need for some good self-care practices is even more important! In a family discussion (Types 2, 4, 7, & 8 represented), I learned that we are each working on creating some structure and purpose in these long, drawn out days.
making small, attainable lists of things to accomplish
planning and creating simple, nutritious meals
investing time in personal growth by learning a new skill or working on something we haven’t done in a while
reaching out for personal, if virtual, connection with others
moving our bodies – yoga, workouts, lots of walking, outside play
prayer, study, meditation
something creative or challenging; clever games, making moustaches (?!), learning activities, baking, art
How are you practicing self care these days?
Here are a few ideas:
Type 1: Give yourself permission to practice self care. Take breaks and have some fun. The work will still be there.
Type 2: Give yourself permission to show yourself some love and hospitality. Practice receiving care and nurture from others.
Type 3: Give yourself permission to slow down. Practice sitting in silence for a few minutes each day. Ask yourself what you are feeling.
Type 4: Commit yourself to productive actions that are meaningful to you. Celebrate the beauty in the ordinary each day.
Type 5: Indulge in a few creature comforts. Reach out to others, take risks, share ideas.
Type 6: Practice some physical activity to move from head to body and help release overwhelming worries. Practice trusting your inner voice and moving forward without all the answers.
Type 7: Practice listening and appreciate moments of silence and solitude. Use your creativity to think of ways to make a disciplined practice include fun.
Type 8: Use some physical activity to burn off energy and practice moving into mindful stillness. Let in the affection and care, remembering vulnerability is not weakness.
Type 9: Practice getting in touch with your personal needs and desires. Engage in physical movement to create well-grounded healthy rhythms.